April 23, 2024 at 12:30 PM
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EDE Dealing with death: help…! That’s how it often feels when someone dies. But not always and everywhere. I was recently allowed to take care of another Moluccan funeral. There is absolutely no shyness in action. The close-knit Moluccan community has beautiful rituals for the days between death and funeral. It makes me happy to be able to help such a family organize the funeral.
OPEN UP
Every culture and religion has its own customs and rituals when someone has died. I always find it an honor and a challenge to join in with those customs and traditions as a funeral director. Even though I don’t know a culture inside out, I like to open myself up to it and ensure that the funeral takes place in accordance with the culture, but also within Dutch regulations.
DEDICATION
This also applies to the funeral of the deceased Moluccan lady. I was impressed by the community involvement in this death. Of the dedication with which women, sometimes very young women, took on the final care of the body as a matter of course.
Where there is mourning, tears fall. But this family did not allow a single tear to fall into the coffin, which remained open as long as possible. Every use has its reason. Sometimes a family knows, sometimes not. Then the relatives – second, sometimes third generation immigrants – ask me to explain the rituals. The Moluccan community has traditionally been a Protestant community. At many funerals, a traditional consolation service, the malam penghiburan, takes place the evening before the funeral. Anyone who can be present is there to comfort the family. During the funeral, eau de cologne and flower petals are liberally sprinkled. The grave here was also closed by the community itself. Unfortunately, this is not allowed in all cemeteries.
IN CONVERSATION
Even if a family has become more secular, the rituals remain important. Then it is a great task to talk to the relatives to arrange a funeral that on the one hand fits how they feel and how the deceased would have wanted it and on the other hand that responds to the culture in question.
EXCURSION ON FRIDAY AFTERNOON
Normally I organize an excursion every first Saturday of the month to give people the opportunity to look behind the scenes of a funeral. I will also do that at the beginning of May, but now on Friday afternoon, May 3 at 4 p.m. That excursion is all about a different culture. If you want to know more about it, call me on 0318-250 888. You will broaden your view and experience the often beautiful meaning behind the customs in another culture. Register by email or telephone.
Do you have other questions? Please feel free to drop by. You can just walk into my office every Wednesday morning from 9:00 am to 10:30 am. The coffee is ready. If that day does not suit you, we will make an appointment at a time that suits you.
This article is brought to you by Mincke van Schuppen Uitvaartbegeleiding. Visiting address by appointment: Zandstraat 59, room 023 Veenendaal, or I will visit you. Fixed walk-in time on Wednesday 9:00 AM – 10:30 AM without appointment. More information: www.minckevanschuppen.nl, [email protected] or tel. 0318-250888 (available 24/7).
