When Marianne returns from her holiday, they drive straight from the boat to the hospital. An operation soon follows in which doctors remove the cysts on her ovaries. When she returns two weeks later for the consultation with the doctor, she feels that something is wrong. “When I saw the doctor walking by, I knew from her look that it was not good.”
Operation
Marianne is told that she has cancer in both her ovaries. “Everything had to be removed: my ovaries, uterus. I asked: ‘Can you save a few more eggs?’, but that was not an option. It was immediate: you have cancer and can no longer have children. That was intense.
I could hardly process it; it was so much. For example, how was I supposed to tell my parents about this? I found that very difficult.” In the meantime, she also has to say goodbye to her desire to have children. “I was given the option to save my uterus, but they recommended not to do so because of the high risk that the cancer would come back. I then decided to have my uterus removed as well. I really wanted to live.”
Transition
Before the operation takes place, Marianne takes the time to say goodbye to her body as it is now. “That was very surreal. I would never see my body as it was again. I would never get my period again and go straight into menopause. I was very afraid of that. In one fell swoop I would become a woman in my mid-fifties.”
A week before Christmas, Marianne undergoes an eight-hour operation, followed by a long recovery. “Afterwards I felt a bit dead inside. So much had happened to me. It was all very complicated.”
Recovery
After the operation, Marianne does not need chemotherapy. The doctors discovered the cancer early, before it could spread. Her physical recovery is going reasonably well. “I wanted to get better very quickly and started with short walks. I just wanted to be healthy, get back to work quickly and participate in society.”
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Although her physical recovery is going well, Marianne lacks adequate psychological support. “If you are diagnosed, you need immediate assistance,” she emphasizes. “I really want to encourage doctors and hospitals to provide that, because that is crucial. I didn’t get that, even though I found everything very complicated. Especially because I was so young and wanted to have children. That made my situation very specific and I would have liked it if I could have received specific help for that. Unfortunately that was missing.”
Place given
Eight years later, Marianne is still cancer-free, but she has suffered a lot from menopausal symptoms. “I had hot flashes, was forgetful and emotionally I felt very flat.” Even though the doctors advise against it due to an increased risk of cancer, Marianne eventually starts hormone therapy. This makes her feel much better now.
“Emotionally things are also a lot better now. I have been able to give way to my lost desire to have children, although it will always remain a scar. For example, I will never experience my children going to high school or becoming a grandmother. That hurts. But I am someone who focuses on what is possible. And honestly, I can now say that I have a happy life, even if it is without children.”
Campaign
Ovarian cancer often causes symptoms that many women experience every day. That is why the Olijf Foundation launched the Silent Lady Killer campaign. Many women are diagnosed too late, which often makes cure no longer possible. After five years, only 34 percent are still alive, we know from the campaign. Symptoms such as a bloated stomach, nausea and frequent urination are well known, but when is it alarming?
Marianne: “Most women who get ovarian cancer are over 60 years old, but as I have experienced myself, it can also occur at a young age. Pay close attention to the symptoms, stay vigilant and if you are unsure, go to the doctor. If something is really wrong, you will feel it. It is crucial to trust your feelings and not be dismissed.”
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Ovaries and uterus Ellemieke Vermolen removed due to ovarian cancer: ‘My children’s safe home is gone’Also read
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